8/31/2002 03:02:00 PM   [ link ]

I am definitely into the heavy duty stuff now. Every other textbook I have had (even the sadistically difficult Solid State Electronics book from last semester) has begun with some sort of introductory paragraph. This paragraph usually explains what the book will cover, what audience it is for, and what it really means to write a book about... whatever it happens to be about.

My physics book seems to boldly shout "Enough with all of these niceties! Enough with 'easing you in' to the difficult material to come! I don't feel like telling you what Quantum Mechanics means to me and how overjoyed I am to write about it! How's THIS for an opening sentence??"
'Imagine a particle of mass m, constrained to move along the x-axis, subject to some specified force F(x, t).'

"Muahahahahaaaa!!"

Or maybe it's a little early in the semester to be personifying my books with antagonistic voices.


8/30/2002 05:32:00 PM   [ link ]

I just parallel parked a bookshelf.


8/29/2002 10:01:00 PM   [ link ]

Dear Self,

In the future, do not attempt to take "power naps". There is no such thing as a power nap. There are only attempted power naps that ends up lasting two hours when the alarm doesn't go off. If you are tired enough to need a nap, you will sleep for two hours. If you are not prepared to sleep that long, do not attempt to go to sleep at all. Avoid your bed at all costs.

Even if certain people try to convince you that a nap will be good for you, do not fall for their evil ploy!!

Sincerely,
Self


8/29/2002 05:17:00 PM   [ link ]

lightistoobright: be entertaining and exciting
anomaly eight: ENTERTAINING! EXCITING!!!
anomaly eight: ME!!
lightistoobright: just turning on capslock does not count
anomaly eight: i do not use capslock
anomaly eight: THIS IS SHIFT ALL THE WAY
lightistoobright: that's nice
lightistoobright: it is also annoying
lightistoobright: and not very exciting
anomaly eight: WHAT'S ANNOYING???
lightistoobright: stop that
anomaly eight: WHAT?
anomaly eight's warning level has increased from 0 to 20%
anomaly eight: hey!
lightistoobright's warning level has increased from 0 to 5%
lightistoobright's warning level has increased from 5 to 10%
anomaly eight: hey how come mine went automatically to 20%??
lightistoobright: because yours was justified
lightistoobright: it KNOWS


8/29/2002 04:36:00 PM   [ link ]

Ignorance (would have been) bliss.

I mentioned this earlier, but I thought a visual image would really drive the point home.

Here is a picture of the front of my Quantum textbook:



Here is a picture of the back of my Quantum textbook:



I have to look at this all semester.

There is a dead cat on the back of my textbook.


8/27/2002 01:46:00 AM   [ link ]

I really wish Ana would stop absconding with my Cheez-its®. Honestly, it's just plain rude.


8/26/2002 04:01:00 PM   [ link ]

How is it that I've forgotten almost everything that was ever good about our relationship, yet you still have so much power over me?


8/26/2002 03:01:00 PM   [ link ]

My life is starting to fall into place. At least as far as the School Sector is concerned.

Class starts Wednesday. I am both ready for the change of pace and completely unprepared for it. I'm taking:


I will dance every day of the week. Whether I want to or not (as attendace is required).

I will TA one class (CS 306). Not my usual (EE 260). This breaks three semesters of tradition. I hope it will be fun.

I will not be working at the CEC helpdesk. I am probably happier about this than I should be.

I will make good grades this semester. (I had better, with only 3 real classes.)

So, yes. My school life is falling into place. Now if I could only get the Interpersonal Relationships Sector back on the right track...


8/26/2002 12:24:00 AM   [ link ]

This is quite possibly the most disturbing thing I have ever seen.

Update: The video no longer plays automatically when you follow the link. You must scroll down and click on "Spock's a Hobbit". (I can't see any way to link directly to it.)


8/25/2002 08:43:00 PM   [ link ]

yesterday I...



today I...



Also, something has been bothering me since last night. Apparently the initial impression I leave on people is that of a complete and total goody goody. Why is that?

I occasionally have a drink. I occasionally swear. For some reason, this seems to surprise people. Why is it so surprising? I don't drink or swear any more than the average person. (Certainly I drink quite a bit less than the average college student.) It's not as if people expected me to be "normal" only to find out that I curse like a sailor and drink to grievous excess. That I could understand. People don't expect me to be "normal" -- they expect me not to drink or swear at all.

Why? What is it about me that causes everyone to hold me to different standards than the other people they meet?

"You're always so serious."
"Oh my god, did you just say 'hell'??"
"Wait, you drink?!"

How am I supposed to react to comments like these? I'm just doing what I normally do, being myself, and people try to make me feel weird about it.

Why do people persist in making me feel uncomfortable when I behave in the exact same manner as everyone else?


8/23/2002 01:29:00 PM   [ link ]

(on swing dancing)

MargieMomo17: I think guys get frustrated more quickly also
lightistoobright: yeah. stupid boys and their fragile egos!
lightistoobright: or as lori said, "I feel like I'm talking to a kindergartener that just did a fingerpainting!"
MargieMomo17: lol
lightistoobright: but he has rhythm. so he will be all right if he keeps coming out.
MargieMomo17: yeah, the problem is also with me b/c I don't have the patience for how much time it takes [new leads] to learn
lightistoobright: yeah, I have patience issues too sometimes.
lightistoobright: I wish I could just snap my fingers at random boys and make them good dancers.
lightistoobright: poof!


8/22/2002 11:00:00 PM   [ link ]

Tonight was my last ballet class for the summer, and it was the hardest one ever. The substitute teacher was far from a typical ballet instructor -- he was a tall black man with dreds and tatoos. (What is it that is so incredibly attractive about men who can dance?) And a huge smile, did I mention that?

I am exhausted.

The usual instructor chooses combinations that are difficult in the sense of being tricky. Hard to put one foot in front of the other without the brain becoming confused.

Tonight, the combinations were easy in that sense. My brain always managed to stay one step ahead of my feet. It was a relief not to feel like a total klutz. However... the combinations were almost impossibly athletic, pushing me to my limits of endurance and balance. Often, they were beyond my limit.

I will sleep well tonight.

instructor: I don't like any of the music on this CD. It all sounds sort of cheesy.
instructor: (reads from CD cover) Classical Ballet for Kids... oh.
girl in class: oh, so that explains why we're dancing so well!


8/21/2002 10:16:00 AM   [ link ]

Proof that Pete only thinks he is weirder than all my friends:

Ehawk1024: hi
lightistoobright: hi
Ehawk1024: hi
lightistoobright: um, hi?
Ehawk1024: hi
lightistoobright: what's up?
Ehawk1024: hi
Ehawk1024 signed off at 10:10:09 AM.


8/20/2002 11:26:00 PM   [ link ]

Jenny and I have decided to Feng Shui our apartment. I thought I should share this, because it amuses me:

Q: My daughter has a poor appetite. She is very particular about what she eats and never eats much in any case. Is there anything I can do to prevent this from becoming serious?

A: By strengthening your relationship with your daughter, you will have a better chance of encouraging her to eat well. This can be achieved by placing some charcoal in a clay dish in the south-west of your home.


8/20/2002 10:33:00 PM   [ link ]

for Emily.


8/20/2002 01:46:00 PM   [ link ]

In which Amy visits Tim and Pete, and watches the weirdest movie ever.

My job is horribly tedious today, so I think I will take a break and post some words here. Yeah.

Slackers is such a weird movie. Not artsy-weird or cool-weird. More like "I'm trying to be funny-weird, but instead I just make you throw your hands in the air and say 'What the hell??'" But also sort of funny at the same time.

I would also like to point out that I am being very good about not making Tim and Pete sound like "retards" in this post. (Just so no one gets concerned that I would do something like that.)

Did I mention that my job is tedious today? Random amusing emails are greatly appreciated.

In conclusion, the dirty whore told me to do it!!

(sorry.)


8/19/2002 12:22:00 AM   [ link ]

I am an idiot. A complete and total idiot.

I forgot to renew my internet connection for the fall semester, and they shut everything off on Friday, so I've been without any connection for the terrible and gut-wrenching period of 48 hours. On top of that, CEC apparently had some issues over the weekend, so my site went down for a while. This caused some amount of distress to at least two people*, but neverfear! My triumphant return includes an entire weekend's worth of posting, displayed below for your viewing pleasure.

* Tom was kind enough to inquire about the absence of my site even though I have never met him in real life. So, go read his website! Marvel at his beautiful photography! Drool over his tales of culinary adventure!


8/19/2002 12:21:00 AM   [ link ]

(actual time: Sunday, 7pm)
I need to come to terms with the fact that classes are going to start soon. So, I thought it would help me to get in the right frame of mind if I went ahead and bought books. My quantum mechanics book has a drawing of a cat on the front. Well isn't that cute? I'll bet it's supposed to be Schrodinger's Cat. Good thing it's alive, right? Ha ha. How clever. Except... on the back cover of the book there is another drawing of a cat. This cat appears to be sleeping, but I can only assume it is intended to be dead.

There is a drawing of a dead cat on my textbook.

This disturbs me greatly.


8/19/2002 12:21:00 AM   [ link ]

(actual time: Sunday, 5pm)
It's good to have roommates again!

Jenny is back in town! We were wandering around campus and ran into a friend of hers. Afterwards:

Me: You used to live with her, right? Back when you had like nineteen roommates?
Jenny: More like seven roommates.
Me: Oh. Are you sure it wasn't nineteen?
Jenny: Actually, it was fifty five thousand twenty four!!... and... a half...
Me: I missed you, Jenny.


8/19/2002 12:20:00 AM   [ link ]

(actual time: Sunday, 3am)
I opened up notepad so I could try to write about the sinking feeling I've had in the pit of my stomach all day. This is what Ana composed for me as I was trying to think.

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.
/6b/'6 fffffffffff
fccccccmnnnnnnnnnn
nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvi8klo
9999999999999999
99990-i[0000000000[/0'p00000000000000000000
00000000['''''''''''''''''''
{_[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[-']

::"? ///

I guess that sounds about right.


8/16/2002 10:52:00 AM   [ link ]

rant!!

I came in to work early today because my boss told me I'd better be here at a reasonable time since he's out this afternoon. Well, here I am (got here at 9:30!) and no one's around and now I've got an email that says I should just wait until Monday to do the work I was going to do today. I got up early for no reason! Waaaaahh! (runs away crying)

Maybe I'll go home and take a nap. Just now I typed "sleep" instead of "spell" in an email, I think my brain is trying to give me a subtle hint.


8/15/2002 12:15:00 PM   [ link ]

retraction of a retraction

I said that I lied. That was supposed to mean that the port card I've been working on this summer does not actually work yet. Turns out, the reason it wasn't working was not my fault anyway, and it (really for real) all works now. Yay!


8/15/2002 03:10:00 AM   [ link ]

(in the style of nickd)



=



?



I hereby award Tim ONE MILLION coolness points for thinking so.


8/15/2002 12:54:00 AM   [ link ]

You would not believe how much easier vintage hair is with that extra 5 inches gone.


8/14/2002 07:22:00 PM   [ link ]

anomaly eight: oh yeah... i took a habit change class to stop procrastinating. that helped a lot
anomaly eight: i got a C in that because i didn't finish all the work


8/13/2002 06:07:00 PM   [ link ]

You can't say that on the air!! (part 2)

I can't even believe this one. Apparently in central Missouri, even LETTERS OF THE ALPHABET are candidates for censorship!

Lyric from "What's Luv?", as heard in St. Louis: "We'd be freakin' all night like we was on E."

And as heard near Rolla, MO: "We'd be freakin' all night like we was on [censored]."

Honestly!! What is the deal with this? Will removing the letter E from this song save your children from the horrors of drug abuse?

(This post has been brought to you by the letter [censored].)



8/13/2002 01:07:00 AM   [ link ]

I keep trying to write about my haircut.

Some people say they feel a sense of empowerment after cutting their hair. They feel empowered by a bold new style, or by the way short hair whips past your chin when you toss your head.

Today I cut my hair. I asked for more than just a trim, for the first time in over 6 years. I cut off more than half an inch, and that's a huge step for me. Even so, it's not a very drastic change. I had so much hair to begin with, who will notice if it's 5 inches shorter?

I keep trying to write about this, but somehow I can't explain the sense of loss I feel as my hair falls to the floor. For me it's the opposite of empowerment, even though I wanted the haircut.

Somehow I can't talk about it without sounding vain.


8/10/2002 04:08:00 PM   [ link ]

My mom is a good cook.

Mom: (brightly) So, how's the cake?
Emily: It's, um... good.
(silence)
Emily: Well, it's not bad.
Emily: It's just not what I expected. The black forest cake at Sophia's* is a lot different than this. This is more... crunchy.
(silence)
Emily: Actually, this is more like a casserole.
Me: (muffled laughter) A Black Forest Casserole??

* (a nice restaurant)


8/10/2002 03:37:00 PM   [ link ]

You can't say that on the air!!

Lyric from the song "Hood Rich", as heard in St. Louis: "Your wife really love me cause the sex is so hot."

Lyric from same, as heard somewhere in the middle of Missouri: "Your wife really love me cause the [censored] is so hot."

Excuse me, but... what the [censored]??


8/10/2002 02:49:00 AM   [ link ]

Tonight I learned that swing dancing skills do not correlate to Dance Dance Revolution skills. At ALL.

I will now hide my head in shame.


8/09/2002 11:40:00 AM   [ link ]

I want my 10¢ back!

So, you remember how soda machines used to have the change return over on one side, but people often forgot their change, so now it's always right by where the soda comes out? I've decided I am not such a fan of this bright idea. Today, my dime actually leapt ski-slope style out of the change return and rolled nonchalantly under the machine. I kicked the machine and then returned the remaining quarter to my pocket, only to discover a dime of unknown origin...


8/09/2002 02:29:00 AM   [ link ]

Just put some better pictures over on Ana's page. (Permanently linked to from my about page, if you must know.)


8/09/2002 02:01:00 AM   [ link ]

Wow. People can be spectacularly dumb sometimes.

Sound from the street carries fairly well through my window. And the sounds I just heard went something like vroooom VROOOOOM VROOM skreeeeeeeee-BANG! I rushed to my window to see how bad the accident was, and strangely saw only one car. Then I reflected upon the volume of the vrooom-ing that preceded the BANG! and realized that someone was actually dumb enough to drive very very fast down a street that they'd never been on before. So fast, in fact, that they failed to notice that my street ends just past my apartment. Conveniently, it ends with a streetlight. BANG.


8/07/2002 04:24:00 PM   [ link ]

Bad Kitty!!



Paws off my fries, or else!


8/07/2002 04:27:00 AM   [ link ]

Being the geek that I am, I had to celebrate the release of Lord of the Rings on video today. So, I piled onto a couch with about 12 guys to watch the movie. Then I watched as said guys amused themselves by throwing poker chips into a fan and sticking markers up each other's noses. Now that I'm home I'm attempting to have IM conversations with three of them, while posting here and updating my webcam.

All of this is collectively exhausting me, so I think I will take a cue from Ana and go to sleep.


8/06/2002 02:31:00 AM   [ link ]

I got a new toy! Looky looky. Now let's see how good I can be about keeping it updated.


8/05/2002 12:07:00 PM   [ link ]

So, I lied.

DAMNIT.


8/05/2002 11:19:00 AM   [ link ]

As if I needed more proof that my landlords have their heads irremovably wedged between their buttocks.

(phone rings)
me: Hello?
woman: Is Michelle there?
me: No.
woman: (nauseatingly chipper) Oh, well this is Jeannie from Parkview*, could you just tell her that we have a package -
me: Actually, she doesn't live here anymore.
woman: Oh.
woman: ...
woman: Could you give me her new telephone number then?
me: Why would I know that?
woman: I just thought... maybe she was your roomate?
me: No.

Shouldn't my own landlord have record of the fact that Michelle (and everyone she lived with) moved out several months ago?

* Parkview Properties: "We're here to make your life comfortable!"

cough. Right.


8/03/2002 02:32:00 AM   [ link ]

If you will, please imagine:

- the 50's.
- the 50's vision of The Future.
- funky shaped chairs.
- bright orange and bright teal couches.
- omelettes.
- strawberry cream soda.

- oh, and jungle music. loud, pounding jungle music.

Are you imagining this strange juxtaposition? Can you hold it in your mind? Now give it a name.

Call it Atomic Cowboy.


read more...